This my opinion.  This may turn into a discussion.  If anyone in the class uses the F-word out of line, they will be taken to the principal’s office and promptly suspended without recess.  Or lunch.

Hi, my name is Alan.  And I’m gay.

That isn’t the first thing you should know about me.  The first thing I would tell you, if you asked, is that I’m a writer.  I’m also a workaholic.  I’m bad in relationships.  I love hiking and cooking and hanging out at malls, watching strange people buy stranger things.  All of these things make up who I am.

But that’s not what you want to know.  And my saying ‘you’, is a general.  I’ve inferred it, ‘cause, gosh, everyone just has such strong opinions on my sexuality.

I like men.  Most of you probably do, too.  We’re not sure why, are we?  Men are assholes.  They’re not always sincere.  They jerk you around, but they make you feel pretty.  Sometimes, they buy you dinner before they sleep with you.  Occasionally, we land a good one.  A solid guy with good morals who’s maybe great in bed.  We have a lot in common with them.  They’re the keepers.

But a lot of guys aren’t like that.  Some girls probably aren’t, either, but I’m gay, so we’re talking about men.

Guess what?  Men treat me like shit, too.  I’ve dated some of them.  Because love is weird like that.  It distorts our reality.  It messes with our emotions.  I’d love to know what to expect out of relationship, but, golly, I grew up with no good role models.

The world thinks I’m a deviant.  And I am.  But for reasons that don’t involve my preference for men.  I want a good relationship, just like anyone else.  Maybe I do want roses.  A movie.  A friendly game of basketball.   But I’m not sure what to expect when I start dating a guy.

Because we learn these social norms from the people around us.  From popular media.  From things like movies and books and comics.  They teach us what to expect.  How to act.  The signs that say, ‘whoa, maybe I’m being treated really poorly and should breakup with this asshole’.

But we don’t have that.  In media, gays (and lesbians) are sexualized.  We’re comedy relief—because our lives are just so fabulous and funny.  We’re tragic.  Brokeback Mountain—maybe it was a love story.  Maybe it wasn’t.  But it was ours.

Great.  Just what I want when I go see a movie.  To remember the bad parts of my existence.  It’s like deciding to watch City of Angels because it’s the only heterosexual movie on the market.

Isn’t that awesome?

What did that teach us?  Anyone in the class care to venture?  

And more importantly, what is my point?

People in the comics fandom get really pissed off when people like me want more gay characters in mainstream.  They think I’m being selfish—that my want is somehow wrong. Or less?  I’m not entirely sure, actually.  What I do know is that people (again, this is a general) seem to have a problem with my discontent.

I’m often told that I should be satisfied with what I’m given.  DC, for example, has several tertiary couples that are gay and lesbian.  That should be enough.  Change comes slowly; society takes time to catch up.

Wow.  I hadn’t noticed.  I should have thought of that, been comforted by that, when I was getting the shit kicked out of me in high school.  It would have lulled me right to sleep at night.

Our wanting characters like us—with our preferences—has nothing to do with sex and everything to do with who we are.  Human interaction has a common element, but the nuances of those elements change depending on gender, which also happens to be a societal construct.

And women, as beautiful as they are, are different from me.  I don’t relate to their relationships with men.  I don’t superimpose myself onto them.  And men in relationships with women act differently.

So the next time you have a knee jerk reaction about someone wanting to see more gay characters, please keep this in mind.  I’m 35.  I’ve seen society change and I am happy with the direction it’s heading.

But if we don’t bitch.  If we don’t moan.  If we don’t rant and rail and remind people that we’re here, nothing will change.  The heterosexual majority will think we are content with the scraps we’re being thrown.

And I am not content.  I am enraged.  I am angry and bitter and trying so hard not to be the diva that society says I am.  The queen.  The bitchy, sassy, limp-wristed, candy-ass, lisping faggot that popular media says that I am.

If only I’d had a hero growing up.  A Superman that I could relate to.

Maybe I wouldn’t be putting my rage boots on.  Maybe my last relationship would have lasted.  Maybe our communication lines wouldn’t’ve crossed.  Because we would have known.  We wouldn’t be guessing all the goddamn time.

So get off your moral high horse and think before you speak.

Class dismissed.

raeseddon:

For monkeyscandance, because she wants more Dick/Damian on her blog. There’s no hug in this one, unfortunately.

I’m working on a much longer fic that will have plenty of that (eventually).

Title: Play

Rating: Low

Characters/Pairing: Damian Wayne, Dick Grayson

Warnings: None

Word Count: 420

Notes: There’s a few pieces of fan art of the bat family playing Monopoly— this is my take on this if it was just Damian and Dick.

Read More

 This was an incredibly cute read.  I can totally sympathize with Dick’s frustration; I hate monopoly, too.  But Damian is a perfect little Wayne, isn’t he? :)

Worked my friend’s comic shop today and we got in the new Gutters. This is only one of the priceless commentaries on DC’s reboot.

Any rumors you’ve heard about me being a complete fanboy for pre52 Roy Harper are absolutely true.  I’ve seen scans of this mini and it’s just too cute.  I need this in my life. Physically.  Digital and scans just won’t do.

I’ve been trying to get my hands on the four part Arsenal mini series from the late 90s written by Devin Grayson and illustrated by Rick Mays with no luck.  I can buy them on Amazon for relatively cheap individually, but the shipping’s kind of killer and no one is currently selling the complete set.  I know this may be a long shot, but does anyone happen to have the complete series they’d be willing to sell/barter/trade? 

If you do and you’re willing to part with it, drop me an email! :)

alanblackbat@gmail.com

Thanks!